Graceful gestures

Physical grace begins with posture.  Ballerinas are trained to stand straight (imagine a string pulling you from the head to the ceiling), bottom tucked under and belly button pulled in and up.  Keep your arms and elbows close to your side.  Carry your own weight, don’t lean against walls and counters or use your shopping cart like a walker for impaired mobility.  Walk with energy, don’t shuffle.    Hold your head up high, don’t rest your head on your hands.  If you drop something on the floor, bend from the knees to pick it up, not from the waist.  Keep your knees together when you sit.

Grace also seems to consist of not touching yourself in public.  Don’t nibble on your lip.  Don’t lick your lips or your teeth nervously. 

When you dress in the morning, check your appearance before you leave—make sure you don’t have bra straps showing, etc.  Then, forget about your appearance—it’s time to focus on other people and other things.  Don’t touch your clothes or your hair or check your appearance in public.  After lunch or after dinner, you can excuse yourself to the ladies room for inspection and touch-ups.  The only maintenance you may do in public is to reapply lipstick. 

Keep your hands off yourself in public.  Don’t pick scabs, don’t pick pimples, don’t pick cuticles don’t bite your nails, don’t fold your arms (this comes across as closed and unfriendly).

Touch others gently.  I was attending a 4h function a few months ago where some of the members brought their animals to display and to teach about pet care.  A mother came and brought her preschool aged children to pet the animals—all three of her children had been taught the two-finger touch for petting small animals and patted the rabbits and guinea pigs gently—no grabbing, no squeezing.  It was wonderful to see. 

Staring into space is ungraceful, especially if your mouth is hanging open at the same time.  Remain focused on the person or task at hand.  Be mindful and present-moment oriented

Speak as softly as possible to be heard.  If you are given coffee or tea in a cup with a spoon, learn to stir the drink without clanking against the walls of the cup.  When you eat, bring the food to your mouth, don’t crouch over the plate. 

Clap softly if you are in a small group.

And remember to speak softly without nasal or straining, avoid slang and use proper grammar.